Saturday, December 28, 2013

"it all came from your heart"

  I have worked the last two days in labor and delivery. Which is unusual because I'm usually put on call when I'm scheduled. So working two 12 hour shifts in a row has become quite rare these days. Thursday I worked in triage, which we were super busy (11 NST's scheduled) and it was me and an RN and yesterday I worked in LD.
  Thursday morning we had a patient come in who was 7 weeks early in her pregnancy. First baby. She ended up being very sick, and the physician strongly recommended early delivery.
  Complete total shock to her. I held her while she cried. Her husband was still not there yet. I held her hand, and told her she was going to make it through this. Right at that time a special care nurse came in and told her that she felt confidant that her baby was going to be OK. She could not have came in at a better time, since I never feel comfortable (and do not have the authority) giving advice on behalf of the neonate, especially premature babies.
  The day went on, she was moved to LD for induction. My day went on in triage, I clocked out at 7 and went home. I thought about her and her baby all night.
  Yesterday I woke up and I was surprised that I was not put on-call. We had a call in and a nurse who requested on-call so I was able to work. When I got to work I found out she had not yet delivered. I was happy that I was going to be able to help take care of her again, this time in preparation for delivery.
  Mid day after she received some pain relief, I was in her room adjusting the fetal heart tone monitor. Her husband and her were both exhausted, on the verge of finally being able to fall asleep after being up for well over 24 hours. What happened next was something that I so needed to hear.
  She says to me " I just want to thank you for just being there for me yesterday, I could tell that it all came from your heart." She went on to tell me how she couldn't wait to tell her husband about my kindness, and how I made her feel like she was not alone, although she was surrounded by complete strangers in such a scary time. Her husband thanked me. He said that they could tell just by watching me work and by my actions that I loved what I did. I replied with how much I do feel passionate about what I do. We held a small conversation and I think I said thank you 10 times :) I told them how much I needed to hear that. I told them about my journey I am on to become a nurse-midwife, something I don't tell many people because believe it or not, I have not had the best reactions to telling people, in which has made me question myself about my decision. She told me to "just do it", and "to not listen to other peoples opinions". She told me that I was perfect for it. To say that I walked out of that room feeling the sun shining on me would be an understatement.

  Yes, I needed that.

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